A Cruel Angels Thesis
by TabrisSeries
Summary: A post 3.33 story where Shinji must adapt to his new lifestyle and his old allies whom he must gain trust with.


This was not the happiness Shinji had desired. After Asuka had retrieved him from the plug, all he had heard was how stupid he was. Being picked up by the WUNDER had been the worst though, every crew member appeared as if they wanted to murder him. Mari put another collar on him, just in case apparently. Shinji cringed as he remembered Kaworu's smiling face as his blood splattered everywhere. Kaworu was the only one who had given him answers, hope, a reason. And he was dead now. His blood was probably still oozing out in the plug, trapped within the destroyed EVA. Shinji had to admit though, he knew now that everyone really did have a reason to hate him. Kaworu's honeyed words had convinced him to pilot one last time, retrieve the spears of hope, and save the world. Be a hero. But now he was nothing but a villain.

"Are you done pouting now Baka Shinji? Or are you still not done crying?" Asuka snapped angrily, her face in a disgusted shape. Shinji remained in his position and kept silent. He was turned towards the cream colored wall, hugging his knees. Growling, the red-haired girl stomped over to him and grabbing him by his hair, pulling his head back. "Listen here brat! You should be real happy that I actually saved you back there, let alone allowed you to live! You think that this is all a game, because your nothing more than a child! Killing the last of humanity? Is that what you wanted? Cause you sure made it look like it! And you had better be careful, because if you make one small move in the wrong direction… Well, I guess you'll just end up like your friend, now wont you?" she hissed into his ear.

Anger boiled inside of Shinji, ready to pop. "You could've helped me at the least." he mumbled. "What? Speak up baka!" she snarled. "From the start, nobody told me anything. You never gave me any answers, no choices whatsoever. When Rei… the clone came she offered me a choice. To come or stay. I went because she gave me the choice! I had no trust left in you people! Kaworu taught me about the world, showed me it! He gave me a choice to save the world or let it stay as it was! The power of choice is the most desirable option! When we were in Dogma, at the corpse, you simply said to me to stay out of it. Stay out of what? You never told me! That the world was going to end if I pulled the spears out! And Kaworu payed the price for it!" Shinji yelled.

"Kaworu? The co-pilot? You really believe that he really wanted to be your friend or show you the world? He only did it for NERV! He's just like the clone!He was using you brat! His feelings for you were fake!" "Thats a lie! I at least know that. You weren't there at his death. You never heard the words he spoke to me! How would you know?!" He screamed. Throwing his head forward, Asuka scowled. "Screw it, your not even worth my time if your that stupid!" she said, already halfway out the doorway. Shinji was left alone. He brought his face back down to his knees, already lost in his previous thoughts.

Asuka stamped down the hallway, looking as if she wanted to kill someone. She was furious of course, for several reasons. That stupid brat wouldn't talk to her about anything except for the clone and his dead boyfriend or whoever and she wasn't able to get any information out of him for Misato. Plus, EVA unit-2 was wrecked! Only because the clones EVA was made out of core! The whole thing! Mumbling and clenching her fists, she didn't notice another girl walking in front of her. Hitting the other girl head on, both girls fell to the ground with papers flying everywhere. "Ugh, watch where your going!" Asuka snapped, rubbing her forehead where she had collided with the other girl. "Nyah! Sorry princess! Didn't mean to mess up that pretty face of yours!" said the other girl. Asuka's face fell. "What. Are. You. Doing. Here. Four. Eyes?" she asked through clenched teeth. Picking up her papers, she looked up with a smirk. "Ah, just delivering some papers over to Ms. Ritsuko your royalty!" Mari said, giving Asuka a wink. Asuka picked up one of the papers and examined the contents of it. It was covered in what looked like synch-rates. "What are these? Are these brat-Shinji's rates in unit-13?" she asked. Mari chuckled and pushed her glasses up. "Bit of the opposite. Ya see, these are the other boy's rates. Which are interestingly high for a human.". Asuka paused. "Wait, how could you know that though?" "Dunno, I guess that Captain Misato has her own secrets too! But one question that I do have though…." Mari smiled. "Well what it is!?" "How did puppy-boy get his choker off in the first place?". The question stood in the air. "Its my speculation that he couldn't have taken it off by himself, and Ikari could not have either. And with this boys synch-rates…". "Tabris." Asuka said with a grim voice. "Heh, but it's just a guess. Im not sure if those Dead Sea Scrolls are right anyway!". "But if it was Tabris, that means that he's still alive.". "I guess we'll just have to see what Ms. Ritsuko says! Nyah!" Mari squeaked, hopping up and running off without another word. Asuka wondered what was up with that girl, always giving nicknames and smelling people…

Misato glared down at the screen from where she watched Shinji. He wouldn't move, and wouldn't talk to anyone except for Asuka, whom to which he only seemed to complain to. The clone, well there was really no use. Her personality was like sandpaper. "Captain, would you like to join me for supper?" Midori asked, holding her hands together tightly nervously. "Go on without me. I have some stuff to deal with first." she replied in a voice that she attempted to come out politely but came out in a cold tone. "Oh! Um, okay. See you at night-shift!" "Until then.". Sighing, Misato sat down in the Captain's seat. Food was tight since Tokyo-3's soil and vegetation had turned to core and EVA parts after the Near Third Impact. She felt dried out, tired. Everything was going dandy before that stupid angel came and ate Rei. But now that she knew what NERV was, she had destroy it. Gendo Ikari didn't care about killing humanity for the Human Instrumentality Project. Misato had to care. She cared for Kaji, Asuka, Shinji, Rei, Mari, God! She even cared for Shigeru! Every last one of them, and all had been put at risk that day, because of Shinji. Deep in her heart, she knew that Shinji was just doing it for Rei, he probably didn't even know that the Doors of Guf had opened. He had raised himself to God… It showed the power of man. The power of love. They had been telling him to get in the EVA, save the world, kill the angels. And he did it for once with the will to do something that day, but instead he killed his friends and most of humanity.

She wanted to forgive him, but she couldn't bring herself to do so. It was as if the boy was far away, out of reach with swirling clouds of pain and hatred blocking her view of him. And that he almost killed the rest of them the other day with the angel. "God… Life sucks." she sighed to herself. What would she do with the clone? It must have been programmed by Ikari to keep silent about NERV, so really she could just dispose of her. But Misato was not a killer. The clone's face still resembled the quiet, calm, peaceful and selfless girl she had once known. And Shinji, well he did have some use that they could drain out of him. Learn and retrieve information about NERV, the double-entry system, and more. Misato was awakened from her thoughts by a small vibration of the communicator that was in her hand. She brought it up to her ear. "Ritsuko?" she called. "These synch-rates. Im already guessing what your thinking about, and I think it's a stupid idea." "Listen to me first off. If we can retrieve that EVA's plug, and the other one, we will have another on our side of winning this war! You know that the EVA series will come, with all the other angels. EVA-unit 2 and the other one are almost completely ruined. Another pilot with that much strength, well lets just say its like putting another queen on our side of the chess board." she insisted. "Who even says that… that thing will even help us?! Those things are monsters! Nothing less, nothing more.". "Im the Captain, and this is an order! Retrieve the plug, and put the plan in action!" Misato demanded, cutting off the connection through the communicator. She clenched her fists and looked back down to the screen where Shinji was. "And Shinji, you will make this plan work. Or God help you and the clone." she hissed.

Shinji looked down to his side, where Sakura had put down his tray of food. It was almost the exact same thing that he was served at his short time in NERV. "And, you can change into this." the girl said, laying down the gown that he wore when he had awakened. What a great way to bring back bad memories! Shinji looked up to her face, and saw that her eyes were downcast and sorrowful. "Im sorry, Sakura. I should've listened to you." he murmured. "It's alright. Just don't… don't do it again alright?" she asked with a small smile on her face. Shinji nodded."Hey, what happened to Toji, do you know?" he asked with hope in his voice."There's no need to trouble yourself with that stuff alright?". "Oh. Im sorry. For your loss, he was good person.". Sakura nodded. "I'll see you later." she said walking out of the room. Shinji looked down at himself. He was still in his plug-suit. He changed out first, neatly folding his suit and placing it beside of him before eating his meal with a small medal spoon. He wondered if they were feeding the clone. It bothered him either way it seemed, even if she was a clone, she was still a human. In a way. Would he stay in this room the rest of his life? Would he ever see her again? Would he ever see the stars? Shinji closed his eyes. "To live… there must be change.".


End file.
